Be Truly Beautiful Inside and Out

“I never look at a woman’s beauty, I want to marry a woman with a good heart,” said a friend of mine recently.  The statement surprised me somewhat, as I had assumed that men generally are attracted to physically attractive women.  Perhaps some are not.  In fact, I have realized through my own observations and experiences that physical attractiveness is not everything.  If someone is physically attractive but mean or nasty, it still ruins the image of him or her physically.  On the other hand, there are people who do not appear to be attractive until they show some signs of inner beauty.  Such inner characteristics can make anyone more attractive and are far more likely to lead to lasting relationships than just looking cute.  One thing I have realized is that beauty does not have to fade with time, in fact it can be improved and grown, it can mature – if taken good care of from the roots.  Beauty has been described on one website, as “a characteristic of a person, object, animal, or idea that provides a perceptual meaning of satisfaction, pleasure, or meaning.  Its experience often involves an understanding of being in harmony with nature.”  Therefore, there is a broader meaning to beauty than is currently used and it seems to have a lot to do with nature.

Whether a person is characterised as beautiful or not seems to be based on a number of factors, whether individually or collectively, and often includes some characteristics of inner beauty, which tend to include psychological factors, such as personality, intelligence, creativity, grace, charm, elegance, kindness, sensitivity, tenderness and compassion. Whereas, obviously, outer beauty includes physical factors, such as health, youthfulness, symmetry, average ness and complexion.  Features such as symmetry in terms of facial features, full lips, and a low waist-hip ration are commonly considered physically attractive for women.  Other factors appear to be cultural, and while some Western men claim that they prefer super skinny women, many others argue that they prefer more rounded and healthier looking women.  There is a lot of personal preference in beauty.  In terms of attraction of a partner, however, it seems that outer beauty is still the most successful method of attraction for members of the opposite gender, although inner beauty plays a strong role in the health of relationships and how they last.  This is according to Michael, J. Roizen MD, Mehmet. C., MD In their book: Being Beautiful: the owner’s manual to inner and outer beauty.  In fact, being beautiful, rather than merely appearing beautiful seems to be part of holistic health in body and mind, while outer beauty seems to be merely physical health.  Therefore, there does seem to be a strong link between physical and mental health and beauty. 

In terms of maintaining our physical beauty, it is important to begin from within, as Bharti Vyas argues.  Diet is important for good skin and to maintain a healthy weight and body.  To maintain healthy skin and a healthy body, one must eat well.  The diet should be as natural and healthy as possible with plenty of vegetables and fruits and lots of water.  Beans, pulses and nuts offer good sources of protein, as do lean meats, but too much red meat is not particularly beneficial.  However, a few times a week should suffice.  Oily fish and their oils are particularly good for skin and hair health, as well as improving mood and brain function.  Salmon is particularly important.  Nuts are another good source of oils and protein and contain vitamin E, also beneficial for skin and hair health.  Improper elimination causes toxins to be held within the body and blood, which can lead to weight gain, clogged skin and pores and weight gain, so plenty of fibre should be included in the diet.  Water is also needed for this.  Whole grains should be consumed instead of white, refined flour products and white sugar should be avoided.  Also plenty of exercise is needed to keep the body in tone and to maintain a good circulation.  After activity, one needs an appropriate amount of rest, which means avoiding staying up late at night without a need.  A healthy sleep pattern is to eat dinner early – preferably before 9 o’clock and be in bed by 11pm.  This is according to Alfred Vogel.  The hours before midnight are the hours where sleep is easiest and most refreshing.  If you can also avoid eating within two hours of retiring, then you are likely to have better sleep and will sleep less while waking more refreshed.  In fact, many people believe that they get more done in the early hours of the morning, so waking early has many benefits.  Since everyone’s internal schedule is different, you should try to eat when you are hungry, sleep when you are tired and follow the needs of your body.  One can play up their most attractive features by highlighting them, for example, using kohl on their eyes, taking care of their hands and so forth.

In terms of maintaining a healthy psychological state of mind one still needs to take care of ones physical self.  According to Alfred Vogel, a healthy body leads to a healthy mind, although Rene Descartes had held the two to be separate.  In fact, it is evident that whatever we do to ourselves physically is going to affect our mind somehow.  One will feel better about themselves and become a more interesting and attractive person if they are able to develop themselves and their hobbies.  For example, taking an art class for those who like to paint, or a dancing class for a person who enjoys dancing.  There are various sport groups and others that can be joined.  One can also develop oneself by considering what they want to accomplish, then considering steps toward this goal.  For example, if there is a particular career path that one would like to take, taking the time to plan and take time to dedicate to such an ambition can be helpful, such as brushing up skills, joining a class, subscribing to newsletters or joining relevant groups or organisations, talk with experts and join relevant groups.  We feel good when we are helping and supporting others to feel good also, therefore, volunteering or helping out at an old persons home or other place can help one feel a sense of accomplishment, personal satisfaction and that one is able to contribute and make use of ones talents and self.  Keeping a journal can help one to get to know oneself a lot better, while writing down ones daily thoughts and feelings.  It helps you to become a lot more aware of what is going on in your life as well as your own thought processes.  Use it to notice areas of weakness that may need working on, and even strengths that one can further strengthen.  If there are issues that affect you deeply then perhaps counselling may be necessary.  Personal happiness is important to develop inner beauty, smiling makes you seem more attractive and others will want to be around you more.  Psychiatrist Dr. Eva Ritvo, of Miami and Dr. Leva Luftman of Beverely Hills in their book The Beauty Prescription: the complete formula for looking and feeling beautiful, they advise women to make the most of what they have, in terms of physical, emotional and cosmetic, to be as beautiful as they can, inside and out.  They suggest giving positive feedback to oneself in order to boost self confidence and find ways to self-nurture, giving positive feedback, while recognising personal strengths and weaknesses.  Further advice is to fulfil life dreams and goals, and follow through on interests and hobbies, taking care of the inner as one would the outer.  Looking after and caring for others also makes a person more inwardly attractive. 

Spirituality, one can develop beautiful traits through morality.  In terms of developing good traits and characteristics and becoming a good or beautiful person, it is necessary to subscribe to some sort of morality at least.  This is the function of religion – to make society and people good citizens.  The basis of most religions is not to harm others, to do good to others, establish the truth and recognise God as the Creator of the universe.  Truth is beautiful and it is not easy to maintain a beautiful spirit while holding against it.  However, at the very least a person should be honest, sympathetic and gentle and try to be good and supportive to those around them in and look out for their well being, if wanting to develop an inner beauty. 

In essence, it seems that to be truly beautiful requires more than botox, going under the knife and getting plastic surgery, and far more than a box of make up.  Beauty is being the very best you can be and being true to yourself.  Strive for perfection in yourself and person, while looking after your health and self physically and it is hoped that ones natural beauty will become apparent.  Developing oneself as a good person is a more lasting and authentic way to become more beautiful and establish authentic relationships with others.