Claustrophobic
I was not born claustrophobic. I developed my fear of enclosed space in high school. I was new in the school then, newly transferred from a far place with a different dialect. Naturally, I was finding my place in my new environment.
When My Fear Began
We were spending our class recess inside the classroom then. I was sitting on my chair watching a few of my classmates, having fun playing push and pull. I wanted to belong then, so I was waiting for the opportunity to be invited to their game. Two of my classmates noticed a newly installed wooden box for cleaning equipment at the corner of the room. It was rectangular in shape. It actually resembled a coffin.
One of my classmates dared everybody in the room to lie down inside the box covered for five minutes. Anyone who can do it would get a “prize”. Naive as I was, I volunteered. I was almost sure there would not be a prize but it was my chance to be in the group. So I went ahead and lay inside the dark box. I thought I could bear it. But when my classmates began pounding on the cover of the box, cheering and laughing aloud, I felt I was fainting. It was as if I was being buried beneath the ground. The sounds were so deafening that I shrieked with fright and tried to push the cover open. When my classmates heard my cry, they were alarmed and hastily opened the box. That incident started it all.
Recent Incident
From then on, I cannot breathe when inside enclosed space, like when my ride goes through tunnels or when I take dark elevators. The most recent difficulty that I experienced was when our group visited the Subterranean River in Palawan, Philippines. When our boat entered the cave I thought I would go hysterical. It was so dark inside and rock formations created fearsome images in my mind.
But since I did not want to ruin the excitement of the group, I braced myself and focused on what the tour guide was saying. Slowly, my attention was diverted from the dark cave to the beauty of rock formations. Stalactites and stalagmites abound the cave which were said to have formed millions of years ago. No wonder the Subterranean River is nominated to be among the New Seven Wonders of the World.
Overcoming Fear
I am still claustrophobic, but I am sure I will be able to manage it. It may not be today, not in the near future but I know it will come. I will not force myself to overcome my fear. Instead, I will embrace it and take my time, until I am ready to conquer it.
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