God Help, I Need Some Sleep

I think I’m having a sleep disorder. It started when I had my fibroid removed few months ago. 

At first, I do not have any difficulty to sleep. I’m not used to stay up late. At most time I will be on my bed by ten o’clock.  Then around two or three o’clock in the morning, I will wake up and then I couldn’t sleep anymore.  I used to think about so many things at that time. It makes my eyes open wider.

Then, I couldn’t make myself to sleep at all.  My eyes will be wide open until morning.  I try so many things in order to get some good sleep. You name it.  Take hot shower, drink warm milk before sleep, use aromatherapy oil like lavender, count hundreds and so on. But still I couldn’t sleep. What’s the matter with me?

I used to beg my doctor to give me some sleeping tablets.  But at the end I didn’t get anything. They said it was dangerous to take sleeping tablets and it was not good for my body.  Like I don’t know that.  But I need my sleep so badly. What else I can do?

Now I know how some people desperately do everything in order to get a good sleep. Michael Jackson was one of them. I couldn’t blame him for taking such a dangerous substances. Now I know how he felt. But I do not want to ended my life that way too.

The funny thing is I don’t feel sleepy at all during a day time. I can do work like others. I don’t feel tired.  I only feel slightly headache in the afternoon. Maybe my high blood pressure is on the rise. Until now I’m still finding a good way or a solution for my lacks of good sleep. I’m afraid I’m going to get a depression one day.

Unfortunately, because of this, I’m having a dark circle around my eyes.  And to get rid of it is another story to tell.