Who, Me? Empty Nest Syndrome?

What a name for a huge change in a parents’ life. So why is it when a child leaves home, and we are feeling sad and lonely suddenly we get tagged with having empty nest syndrome? Most people think that they can’t wait for their teenagers to grow up and get a life. The reason behind the term empty nest is the comparison that most people make between the care and nurturing of birds to their offspring. Birds prepare their babies to leave home and be on their own. They seemed to be a lot more focused on getting them out of the nest than we are though.

When Sad is Normal

It is normal for both parents or a single parent to feel sad and a little lost when their child leaves home. Especially the first one for those of use with more than one child. We spend so much time caring for them that it is easy to forget we are also preparing them to go out into the world. The sadness we experience is not abnormal and should not be tagged as a syndrome. The parent or parents may experience situational depression. With time parents begin to feel better and learn to adjust to the change of a child leaving home. It is almost like a right of passage for parents.

When Sad is Not Normal

These symptoms become a syndrome when they are exaggerated and the parent just can’t seem to move on with their life. There are signs of depression beyond the normal situational depression that occurs with life changes. Feelings of loss can be overwhelming to that parent. It may affect all aspects of their life and relationships with others. This type of depression is not normal and should be addressed with your doctor.

Help for Empty Nesters

There are several things that can be done when your child leaves home for the first time for those with more situational type depression. Talk with other parents who may be going through the same time in their life, as a support for each other. Call and talk with your child some. Notice, I said some. In a lot of cases you will find out soon enough that when they need you they will call you. They usually miss their parents, even if they don’t think they will. Find something new and interesting to do. Take up a hobby that can be shared with others. If you have empty nest syndrome or are not sure talk with your doctor. He or she can help by referring or directing you to resources or other professionals that can help to meet your specific needs. You are not alone. Many parents go through some type of depression when their children leave home.