Women Who Try to Do Too Much
In search of perfection, many women commit themselves to more than their time allows. Women need to know that it’s okay to be less than perfect. Managing time is important for a woman’s mental health.
There is an old saying, if you want something done ask a busy person. There are all sorts of reasons why busy people tend to get things done. I’d like to think it’s because busy people are exceptionally well organised. This may be the case for some, but for others it’s a mere case of being unable to utter that simple word, NO. Then, having made the commitment, they go out of their way to make sure the task is completed on time.
It may come as no surprise to you to know that women are the major culprits in this over commitment dilemma. Women are used to juggling their lifestyle. They manage to fulfill parenting and work obligations and still occasionally find time for themselves. And, if at times there is absolutely no time for themselves, they understand their time will come. So they usually breeze through their busy schedules with a smile on their face.
Unfortunately this is not always the case. Some women have a need to be perfect. They need to be seen as the perfect Mom, the perfect partner in life and the perfect work employee. Trying to be perfect is definitely hazardous. This perception of needing to be perfect can cause a woman to take on far more than she can realistically manage. In these cases mental health is definitely endangered.
There is a third category and it is into this I think I fit. These are the people who love life so much they want to cram as much as possible into it. Not for me the boredom of not knowing what to do. I’m one of those people who are far too easily inspired to take on something new, even when I know I have enough fun activities in my life already. If something sounds interesting, I’m likely to put my hand up to have a go.
Admittedly, as I’ve become older, I have become a little wiser. When a new opportunity arises. I consider my current commitments before I make a decision. How I hate having to turn something down. Very occasionally I drop an activity from my life, only temporarily mind you, in order to take on something new. Once forever in danger of over commitment, I have now learned to regulate activities according to the time available.
It is common knowledge that everything should be done in moderation. That includes accepting new commitments. No matter how interesting an opportunity seems, or how desperately you want to be seen as the perfect woman, you need to weigh up the pros and cons. Consider whether you can realistically give your best when someone asks you to do something. Is the new commitment going to seriously intrude into the little time you have?
If you don’t believe you can give of yourself one hundred per cent without affecting your own mental health, remember there is always that magical word to fall back on. NO.
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Liked it
khoziru kun | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
nice article
ricara | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
It’s so hard to say no to your boss, your loved ones, and your friends but you’re right, we also need to take care of ourselves
petercurtis97 | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
Val, thanks for writing on this topic I am sure it is on most women’s mind. The point made where the fairer sex often juggle duties and to me calling it multi-skilled is a myth where men are thought to be able to function with one duty at a time. Give us a break we can handle more than that
J M Lennox | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
Very good advice Val. I agree that as we get older it becomes easier to say ‘No”, although probably due to doing exactly what you’re forewarning us not to do!
indianwriting | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
absolutely right val!!!.one cannot be perfect.somewhere we feel guilty that v r not doing justice to our children/husband/ boss etc etc. v need 2 get out of this ‘perfection syndrome’ and grant ourselves a breather. v will do far better.. and heck…we have right to be pampered…by ourselves..if not by others
magicdarts | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
always got to try and make some time to just be in every day, just too much going on in modern life!
magicdarts | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
always got to try and make some time to just be in every day, just too much going on in modern life
wonder | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
I love to cram in many things together,there isn’t much time for perfection for everything, except in the things of priorities and passion.
PR Mace | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
I am one of those who try to do to much. You are a wise women and this was a good article. I must learn to say no sometimes.
stonecutter | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
great advice. it is alright to say no to things you are not really passionate about.
Shirley Shuler | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
I agree with you, Val. I never take on more then I can chew, if I can’t do it, no matter how much I may want to, I just say NO. Well said my friend.
LoveDoctor | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
The last statement in this article is very true. I notice that many people have a hard time saying No to others. There’s no such thing as perfection. You can’t please everyone.
yes me | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
All in moderation at ones own pace cheers Val
Erin Miller | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
The word know is very powerful when used effectively. lol. Unfortunately, I find myself not using it very often. lol
Karen Gross | Dec 11, 2011 | Reply
You seem to have such energy, so much vigor and vim, I hope that you retain it for as long as possible so that you continue all of your adventures.
papaleng | Dec 12, 2011 | Reply
Well-stated points. I believe regardless of gender and circumstances, One has to know what his/her priority at the moment is.
bearhugs | Dec 12, 2011 | Reply
Very nice article!!
Christine Ramsay | Dec 12, 2011 | Reply
It is always difficult to say no as I have often found out to my cost, but as you say age mays us a little wiser. A very enjoyable article. I hope your foot is on the mend now, Val.
Michal Dorcak | Dec 13, 2011 | Reply
Excellent article. I think my mom should read it. She does not speak English though …
ImKarn23 | Dec 16, 2011 | Reply
balance, baby – the secret to going long, not hard
blackrosemyth | Dec 16, 2011 | Reply
My article Dark Days and Light Days of Our Life’s is kind of related to this article but in a different way, check it out ;D http://socyberty.com/philosophy/dark-days-and-light-days-of-our-lifes/
smcopywrite | Dec 18, 2011 | Reply
great advice. this is something that i hope many people will read around mothers day and other days of the year when you are celebrating the women in your life. make certain you understand how difficult and demanding the life a woman can be.
thanks for sharing.
jennyreeve | Apr 30, 2012 | Reply
Many modern mums try to do too much, out of necessity though I feel. I used to work full time once my children went to school and being a Veterinary Nurse, I was also ‘on call’ if an emergency came up. We all know how difficult this can be when you have a young family. The pressure is worse nowadays for mums.