There are many positives when it comes losing weight: new clothes, self respect, health benefits, and yes…confidence to start dating again.
The other day I decided to update my personal blog site with an updated weight loss picture because it had been almost two months since I’ve documented photographic progress. In the beginning of this journey, I didn’t want my picture taken at all – even if it was the result of placing the camera on a tripod and setting the timer. When you’re fat, you somehow know it, but you still have some sense of pride and don’t want to be the object of photos…or the only object in the photos that’s talked about. So to document my weight loss has been a self-conscious action I’m still not comfortable with, but glad I’ve done it.
One of the benefits of losing weight is…you begin to understand mentally you’re starting to look good, and maybe members of the opposite sex are noticing it, too. I’ve been noticing since I started running again with the slightly cooler temperatures, that the opposite sex has noticed me and is voicing approval with honks and wolf calls. As I told my friend not that long ago, “It’s not that I don’t appreciate the wolf calls, it’s just…where were they 10 years ago when I could’ve really enjoyed them?!” She doubled over laughing but completely understood I was making light of bad behavior.
As a child in science class, I remember learning about how magnets with opposite charged poles are attracted, while similar charged poles repel. We’ve all played with magnets and used the like poles to push the magnets around for fun. Unfortunately, this simple principle of physics doesn’t work well in the real world, as I recently discovered.
I told my good friend of a step I’d recently made because of my weight loss – I put up an online dating profile on a major website. A date is almost foreign to me because I haven’t been on a real one in almost ten years. As I became heavier with time, I found some men changed the dating rules when it came to fat women. The worst rule was, “If you want to date me, you’re going to have to pay for the date”; it wasn’t explicitly spelled out, but every date strangely went down the same road. Of course at the end, sex was expected by him, and that was going too far, so I gave up the idea of finding a good man who’d actually pay for the date instead of expecting me to all the time. That didn’t happen when I was skinny, but I did pay for dates back then because I didn’t think it was fair the man always had to pay.